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Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 05:38
by Forboding Angel
He had a heart transplant 2 years ago, but lately has been in and out of the hospital quite a bit but it's been pretty ok tho for the most part. Well a week ago last friday he went in because he had a bloot clot in his lung and somewhere else (I believe it was his leg but I dunno for sure).
Ever since then shit's gone 100% downhill. As it stands he is in ICU and is going to die. Every organ in his body has shut down and machines are keeping him alive. They are going to try to do an artificial heart transplant and wake him up from the coma so that he and his family can say goodbye. He is 23, he has a wife and a little boy (About alexander's age) Edit: Sorry unclear. About 2.5 yrs old.
I know that there are some christians here as well as other faiths. I would appreciate it if you guys would take a brief moment to remember Kyle and his family in your prayers. Myself and the rest of the band are taking it pretty hard. We're gonna go see him tomorrow and it's pretty much our chance to say goodbye. We won't see him awake which sucks, but understandably the awake part is reserved for his wife and his son.
Kyle is a really good guy. It's not fair at all (yes I know life isn't fair and all that, but you name something that fits better there

). He got a second chance at life that he shouldn't have needed in the first place, and now only 2 years later even that's been taken away. Talk about a shitty deal

.
At any rate thanks for reading. Your prayers are appreciated.
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 06:07
by Dragon45
Has he been facing any problems with insurance, or financial issues, or....?
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 07:19
by Forboding Angel
No not really. Not even any serious health issues tbh. He had been in and out of the hospital quite a bit recently, but it was all minor stuff.
God, this fuckin fails.
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 08:00
by clumsy_culhane
*adds to prayer list*
Poor guy

and his family too..
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 18:31
by manored
Its not over until its over, reunite a large group of people and put strong and believing mental effort into his curing, I will send some thoughts too. into doesn't matters how much you or we pray, if we believe that he will die, he will.
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 18:47
by Jazcash
Many condolences, I'll pray.
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 21:25
by PicassoCT
Horror to die so young.. just when you thought you got a second chance. Hope he really reawakes for the Family to have there last farewell words...
PS: Can we have a Picture..
As an Atheist i have no hope to give by prayer, but i will raise a glas to those two years in the sunlight. Tell us more Forboding, tell us something funny, something sad, make him alive, survive in Memories, Tales told on.

Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 21:49
by Sleksa
PicassoCT wrote:
PS: Can we have a Picture..
. Tell us more Forboding, tell us something funny, something sad, make him alive, survive in Memories, Tales told on.
aye.
I hope the wife and the kid will get some support too
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 22:16
by Forboding Angel
tbh there aren't any specific memories that immediately come to mind... there are just so many :-/
Here is a picture of him and his son kale about 2 years ago or so. I dunno where more recent pictures are. I'd have to look or ask Mike (Other guitar player), he's the one that religiously catalogs photos
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 22:43
by Wisse
Sry to hear that
I can't imagine how it's going to feel when they wake him up to say goodbye.
As an Atheist i have no hope to give by prayer, but i will raise a glas to those two years in the sunlight.
Same here.
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 13 Oct 2008, 23:35
by manored
PicassoCT wrote:Horror to die so young.. just when you thought you got a second chance. Hope he really reawakes for the Family to have there last farewell words...
PS: Can we have a Picture..
As an Atheist i have no hope to give by prayer, but i will raise a glas to those two years in the sunlight. Tell us more Forboding, tell us something funny, something sad, make him alive, survive in Memories, Tales told on.

Do not pity those who leave, pity those who stay.
Then someone dies, trying to mantain the memories alive only increases the pain... people think they have to do so, that forgetting the dead one would be an offense to him, but nobody wants their loved one to suffer with their dead, so the greater thing you can do for the deceased is to forget him. If that sounds somehow cruel, remember that you will one day meet him again and, if you dont believe in afterlife, you believe that everthing is destined to an end then, as well as the person.
But I think we are getting a bit ahead of ourselves here, he is not dead yet, lets not lose hope in randow and in the mysterious powers of will :)
After all, having a so-so disease turn on deadly from day to night sounds as likely as the miracle necessary to be saved from it :)
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 14 Oct 2008, 02:04
by IllvilJa
Very sorry to read these bad news. I reread your first post and no, I did not misunderstood it, it really says that your friend is about to die.
It is hard to find words for this. Of course it is an awful way to die, especially as he was given a second chance, and my thoughts are of course with his wife who loses her husband and his son who loses a father. And given his young age, I can imagine his parents still are alive, and they are losing a child as well.
And you are losing a friend.
Regarding another post about 'forgetting' the person you have lost. I think I understand what you mean. Part of the grief you have to handle after losing someone is the feeling of sort of betraying him or her by letting life go on (because it just has to in so many aspects) in spite of him or her being gone.
It is sad he leaves a son behind who don't get the opportunity to know his father and for that child, it is important that you who know his dad to keep some memory alive still. Photos, movies, sounds of his father talking, all that will be of course be invaluable for that child, especially as he grows up, becomes an adult and he tries to understand what parts of his father he carries on in himself in his life.
In one way it is fortunate still that he got a son, as your friend has left a definitive mark in this world which will remain and live on (literally) once he is gone.
It is fates like the one your poor friend that makes me understand that I'm lucky to be as old as 38 years, and which has made me never take for granted that I've ever reach this age in the first place.
It is true that life is unfair, but that does not make this less painful for those who involved.
My thoughts are with you.
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 14 Oct 2008, 02:09
by Panda
I'm sure his loved ones, including you and his friends, will do your best to be supportive of one another and live well in his absence when it occurs. Best wishes to you and your friends and may he and his family find peace.
Wisse wrote:Sry to hear that
I can't imagine how it's going to feel when they wake him up to say goodbye.
Usually when someone wakes up from a coma, they're very disoriented and may not be able to communicate. But, either way, talking to him, even while he's in a coma, can help. I just hope that his family doesn't get their hopes up too high when they try to wake him up.
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 14 Oct 2008, 07:06
by Forboding Angel
Well, a little status update. Me and the guys went and saw him this evening. Long story short, this is no chance whatsoever unless all of a sudden his body started liking the transplanted heart, in which case he might end up as a vegetable or an invalid and I really don't want to see that happen.
I learned some things I never knew tonight as far as background so I figured I would share a bit. He was born with a very small heart defect (that technically should have cleared up on it's own). The top of the heart was kinda backwards somehow and instead of repairing itself, it just got worse and worse until it blew itself out after 22 years. Then he got the transplant from a lady who wrapped her car around a tree. Kyle got to know that family fairly well after his transplant and would send them cards and stuff.
Long story short, the new heart never fully took. His body has been trying to reject it the entire time (which is common) but has been kept in check by anti-rejection meds (basically blood thinners). Unfortunately Kyle has a very good immune system and it fought him pretty hard. He was kinda in and out of the hospital for the past year or so. Nothing real serious, mostly just kinda small stuff like insulin and ya know, not life threatening stuff. Each time it kinda took him longer and longer to bounce back.
He's been in the hospital quite a bit the past 2 month, always with non serious stuff, in fact he made such a big deal about missing band practice to his wife that he walked out and went looking for the car on 4 levels of carport parking. You gotta understand, Kyle was a real big guy, 6 foot 2" heart of gold, bout 225 pounds, but the guy is stubborn in the most endearing way
Well it all kinda led up to this... He is expected to pass overnight, but if he hangs on till the morning, they're going to turn the machines off.
I did remember one really funny time today while me and the guys and family etc were talking. Kyle loved jegermeister, so one night we're all sitting around having a good time and kyle hits like 8 jegerbombs. Tells his wife he's gonna go take a shit... Well a while goes by and no kyle. So tanya goes and finds him in the spare toilet (which is barely large enough to fit him), he's passed out, snoring his ass off, and still has his pants around his ankles. Try to wake him up... Ain't happening. It took 4 guys to drag him off the toilet. They had to pull his underwear up for him and carry him to bed, all the while trying very studiously to ignore "the Goods". Notice I say "They" and not "We"... I didn't want any part of that
lolz, good times

Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 14 Oct 2008, 07:36
by REVENGE
Best of luck to Kyle and his family, and just hope for the best.

Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 14 Oct 2008, 19:31
by Forboding Angel
Another quick status update.
Umm sufficing things, over the night his BP went up so they are waiting on pulling the plug, however it's not exactly good news either, cause when a heart is about to fail there is generally a rise in BP, so meh.
But he's not gone yet. It would be wonderful if his heart started working right, cause from what I understand the rest of him is actually still in real good shape, so if it did he would be able to recover. But sadly, it's kind of a forlorn hope, but maybe just maybe, fate will leave one of the good guys with us.
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 14 Oct 2008, 21:13
by PicassoCT
I wish Kyle everthing good, maybee he still has days, weeks, months. Maybee there is something like a Wonder, he will battle long enough, to get a second heartreplacement.
But for the worst case, have you thought about forming some sort of friendfund to help the widow, and later his child(education)? It may look very old fashioned & coldblooded first to bring up that Thing, but it is one of the view things you can do for those Living left behind, and ease at least one fear a dying man usually has...
Sorry for Enlightment to phail so completely on bringing your friend something to replace the heart, especially while hundreds of potential replacment are burried with people, not leaving a Family behind.
One last Thing, have you prepared Videoequipment for the Awaking? His Child may be now to young to remember, but i at least would be gratefull, to have at least some sort of, even artificall ones on a tape, from my father..
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 15 Oct 2008, 00:13
by manored
Do not lose your hopes, the greater the hope the greater the chances.
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 15 Oct 2008, 00:15
by Panda
I saw a video of a lady who woke up from a coma. She said she didn't believe that she was watching herself when she watched the video. I have to admit that it didn't look like a heart-warming experience, but after a very long process of physical therapy designed to get her used to using her limbs again and exercises used to help her to speak again she was alright. She wasn't in a coma for very long, though, and her circumstances were different. She had been injured in a car accident and fell into a coma.
Re: Our Drummer is in the hospital
Posted: 15 Oct 2008, 18:44
by Wolf-In-Exile
Hope Kyle can make a recovery, good luck.